Why I Can't Have Nice Kings

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Harry Olson is a critically-maligned but commercially-successful fantasy author. After one too many bad reviews, he drinks himself into unconsciousness and wakes up in what he thinks is a television show based on the world he created.

Unable to get the actors to show him the way out, he is forced to play along. Unfortunately, whoever wrote the show only did enough research to get the basic descriptions of his world down and little else. If only he had read the fine print in his first contract.

Determined to escape so that he can publish his side of the story before the show airs, he is stopped at every turn by singing knights, cartoonishly-accented tribesmen, naked allies, tickling thieves, and his own awe-inspiring cowardice.

Why I Didn't Save Anyone

Reeling from the aftermath of the last book, Harry's assistant Hat figures out just the right thing to do to fix everything. But then he just has to go and take that nap.

Soon after waking up in the world Harry writes about, Hat encounters a naïve young man with a spoon of incredible power whom he soon realizes is one of the most important figures in the history of that world. However, the man is not what Hat expects, and his attempts at greatness often end disastrously.

Should Hat intervene and risk changing the history of his favorite world or should he let his foolish new friend continue to make mistakes that could destroy everything he loves?

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Copyright © 2019 Matthew Helbig - All Rights Reserved.